One Flesh: SALT’s Commentary for Twentieth Week after Pentecost
Twentieth Week after Pentecost (Year B): Mark 10:2-16
Check out SALT’s “Strange New World” podcast episode on this passage, “Understanding Jesus - Part Four: How Jesus Reads Scripture.”
Big Picture:
1) This is the sixth week of a twelve-week chronological walk through several chapters in the Gospel of Mark.
2) Jesus has been teaching his disciples about being “servants of all,” including serving children (despite their lack of power or status) and religious outsiders (despite their apparent threat as “competitors”). In both cases, Jesus turns the conventional notion of “service” on its head: servants typically work for someone more powerful than they are, and what’s more, their service is typically reserved for those within the fold, not external rivals. For Jesus, however, being a “servant of all” means caring not only for “insiders” but also — and especially — for relatively powerless outsiders, the left out and left behind. And in this week’s passage, Jesus continues to develop this theme of serving the vulnerable, this time in the context of marriage and divorce.
3) It’s crucially important to start here: In first century Palestine, marriage and divorce were profoundly patriarchal institutions in which women and children were technically considered the property of men. By contrast, in ancient Roman society, both husbands and wives could initiate divorce, and there’s evidence that at least some Jewish wives could, too — but in the main, Jewish law traditionally gave that power to husbands, as Deuteronomy 24:1-4 makes clear. The acceptable grounds for divorce, however, were a matter of considerable dispute in Jesus’ day. Some taught that only adultery could trigger divorce (Jesus himself takes this view in Matthew 19:9); others followed Deuteronomy’s broader standard that anything “objectionable about her” — that is, objectionable to the husband — could suffice (Deut 24:1). Moreover, women and their children were highly dependent on marriage for their livelihood and wellbeing, and this dependence, combined with their husbands’ ability to initiate divorce, put women and children in an acutely vulnerable position. To understand Jesus’ teaching on divorce, we have to bear this first-century Near Eastern context in mind. Who is most vulnerable in this picture? Women and children.
4) Though Jesus seems to issue a straightforward, blanket prohibition against divorce in this passage, once we start to dig in, important complexities emerge. First, as we have seen along the way in Mark, Jesus often speaks in striking, hyperbolic terms in order to provoke his listeners, and to convey his ideas in bold brush strokes. (This is a rabbi who’s just said, “If your eye causes you to stumble, tear it out” — not someone to take too literally! (Mark 9:47)) Second, since our twenty-first-century context is so different than his first-century one, we’re wise to focus less on statutory details and more on underlying principles. Third, it’s worth noting that many of the earliest Christian communities didn’t take a categorical view of divorce. Matthew (likely writing shortly after Mark) includes an adultery exception (Matthew 19:9); Paul (writing shortly after Jesus’ death) also permits divorce in certain circumstances (1 Cor 7:15).
5) And fourth, Jesus’ teaching — in this passage and elsewhere — often showcases a relatively supple, context-oriented understanding of how the law works in practice. In this story, for example, he reframes Deuteronomy 24:1-4, explaining that Moses permits divorce “because of your hardness of heart,” thereby casting the law as sensitive to human struggle (Mark 10:5). Indeed, one of Jesus’ signature ideas is that, in difficult cases, the law should be interpreted for the sake of human flourishing, not the other way around: the law was made for humanity, not humanity for the law (see, e.g., Mark 2:27). Finally, as we’ll see below, a close reading of this passage reveals that Jesus isn’t actually interested in categorically prohibiting divorce, but rather in positioning it as a last resort.
Scripture:
1) Some Pharisees ask Jesus if divorce is lawful, in order “to test him” — but why would this be a test? Perhaps because the issue was divisive enough that any answer Jesus gives will be unpopular. Or perhaps they have another kind of trap in mind: the only other (implicit) reference to divorce in the Gospel of Mark is the story of Herod and Herodias, in which John the Baptizer criticizes their marriage as “not lawful” — no doubt at least partly because Herodias had to divorce Herod’s brother first (Mark 6:18). In other words, the question may be a “test” because of its potential to lure Jesus into criticizing Herod — a move that didn’t work out so well for John (Herod had him beheaded)!
2) Turning the tables, Jesus has his questioners answer their own question — and they reply, Yes, divorce is lawful, citing Deuteronomy 24:1-4. Now, the central point of that ancient text is to prohibit husband-and-wife couples from remarrying each other for a second time, after the wife’s been married to someone else in the interim. But along the way, the passage conjures up a world of common and capricious divorce, with men simply deciding that “she does not please him,” or finding “something objectionable about her,” and then ending the marriage (Deut 24:1). To this patriarchal ethos of divorce on-(male)-demand, Jesus objects. He reframes Deuteronomy’s permission as an accommodation to human “hardness of heart” (Mark 10:5). God’s original vision for marriage, Jesus insists, is that two people are joined and become “one flesh,” and the capricious divorce portrayed in Deuteronomy 24 violates that original vision (Mark 10:8; Gen 2:24). Likewise, privately with his disciples, Jesus equates remarriage with adultery — strikingly phrasing his teaching in egalitarian terms, as though both men and women have equal agency: “...divorces his wife...divorces her husband…” (Mark 10:11-12).
3) Is this a categorical prohibition of divorce? On one level, Jesus is clearly critical of divorce in this passage, contrasting it with the divine ideal of becoming “one flesh.” But on the other hand, it’s striking that he draws this contrast without declaring Deuteronomy’s permission to divorce null and void. He doesn’t say, Moses was mistaken. Nor does he say, The divorce described in Deuteronomy is no longer valid. Rather, he effectively says, What Moses says about divorce is well and good, but don’t forget: it’s an accommodation to human struggle, not an expression of the divine ideal. On the contrary, God’s ideal vision for marriage is that it entails becoming “one flesh,” two people who care for each other to such an intimate, life-giving degree that they become one, and they cannot be torn asunder. Don’t take that vision lightly. Strive toward it as best you can, and reserve divorce (which, yes, is permitted by Moses) as a last resort. And to men, in particular, who might be tempted to take advantage of Moses’ words, “she does not please him” or “something objectionable about her” — think again! God calls you not to be selfish, entitled, and cavalier, but rather to be humble, to serve your spouse, and to serve your children.
4) The fact that Jesus doesn’t reject or nullify Deuteronomy’s permission to divorce is the telling card he puts on the table: his view isn’t a categorical prohibition of divorce, but rather a prohibition of cavalier, contemptuous forms of divorce and tearing asunder. The permission still stands — though it’s properly understood, Jesus contends, in light of the divine ideal outlined “from the beginning of creation” (Mark 10:6). That ideal is this: when two people step into lifelong partnership, they become “bone of each other’s bone, and flesh of each other’s flesh,” caring for each other as though they are caring for themselves. It’s how many people picture partnership — and it’s what many couples aspire to, even when it doesn’t come to pass. What’s more, lifting up this ideal is perfectly consistent with the notion that a marriage sadly falling far short of it, a marriage that creates more harm than good, is indeed rightly ended. But Jesus wants to ensure that our default position is to strive for the “one flesh” ideal — with divorce reserved as a last resort, to be used not when, say, “she does not please him,” but rather when the partnership becomes injurious to one or both partners.
5) Why does Jesus insist upon striving for the “bone of my bone,” “one flesh” ideal? Marriage certainly isn’t for everyone, but for many people, a lifelong intimate partnership can be a source of growth and happiness. And just as important, in the ancient world marriages could create sanctuaries of livelihood and wellbeing for women and children — and conversely, divorces could put women and children out into harm’s way. Here lies the deep kinship between Jesus’ teaching on divorce and his practice of welcoming children, which Mark turns to at the end of this very passage: Jesus is always specially concerned with protecting and advocating for the most vulnerable. And not only because they are exposed to harm! Children, he says, can be open-minded, open-hearted, and therefore receptive to God’s blessings in exemplary ways. The rest of us should follow their lead: “Whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it” (Mark 10:15).
Takeaways:
1) For many, the good news of the Gospel in this passage is that Jesus does not condemn divorce categorically, but rather positions it as a last resort. This may be received as good news both by many whose lives have been affected by divorce, and at the same time, by many who value lifelong partnership as something to strive to preserve.
2) The challenge of the Gospel in this passage is that God’s ideal vision for marriage — and by extension, any lifelong partnership — is of an intimate, symbiotic bond, a union in which two people become “one flesh,” caring for each other as if caring for themselves, and thereby a sacramental training ground for caring for the wider world. This ideal vision can be both inspiring and daunting. What does it look and feel like to be “one flesh”? What practical wisdom, what best practices might help along the way? Imagine hearing testimony and advice from people in longstanding partnerships, from various generations, about this important subject...
3) And finally, for married and unmarried people alike, and for families of all shapes and sizes, the good news of the Gospel in this passage is that God cares especially for the most vulnerable, and calls us to do the same. Jesus evaluates social institutions (like marriage and divorce and family) through this lens, and he sees social groups (like women and men and children and “outsiders”) through it, too. Vulnerable groups deserve respect and protection, of course, and it’s also true that their wisdom and perspective deserve attention — not least because of what they can teach the wider community about faith, love, and “receiving the kingdom of God” (Mark 10:15).
Check out SALT’s “Strange New World” podcast episode on this passage, “Understanding Jesus - Part Four: How Jesus Reads Scripture.”